There is so much I want to blog about, but I thought I should start with this.  I’ve been MIA recently because my father had a stroke.  He had an inoperable intracerebral hemorrhage deep in his basal ganglia. It was touch and go there for a while, and scared the bejesus out of my sister and myself.  However, he is doing much better now.  He is actually moving from the hospital to a rehab center possibly today or tomorrow.

He’s got a long road to recovery, but he’s in good spirits.  This type of stroke doesn’t kill brain cells, it merely suppresses them from the pressure of the bleed.  But once the blood in his brain is reabsorbed by his body, those cells can regain their function.  He currently has a very weak right arm and the right side of his face doesn’t work very well.  It’s hard for him to talk, so not only does he have physical therapists, he has a speech therapist and occupational therapist as well.  Whew!

I just visited him yesterday, and he was doing much better from when I saw him last on the 1st.  It will take time and he’ll never be back to 100%, but he’ll get some range of motion back.

As you can imagine, I’ve been frantically dealing with everything, from taking care of my dad to juggling the kids and my own family life with DH.  I came home early last week thinking he was on the mend only to turn around two hours later on the same day and race back down to Salem (an hour drive) because he’d taken a turn for the worse.  But thankfully, they were able to stabilize him and he’s much better now.  They are still very aggressive about keeping his blood pressure down as well as his blood sugar.  It’s been quite the roller-coaster.

But I’m very hopeful now, as he’s going into rehab.  He’s no longer at risk for a second stroke, he just needs some therapy to bounce back.

Aside from all that hoopla, I got my second edits for THE FALL OF JERICHO and it’s release date: July 23rd.  Woohoo!  Only thing I don’t have yet is the cover.

However, I DO have the cover for BLACK ANGEL, but I’ll post that in a new post.  It’s glorious!

I’m also about 80 pages away from finishing THE FALCON PRINCE!  I’m so excited.  The Falcon was the one prince I didn’t have a solid plot for, but he’s given me a great story to work with and a way to set up the Spider Prince’s book, which I’m also very anxious to write.  But I was the same way with the Scarab Prince.  Speaking of, I haven’t heard word about my submission on TSP, but my publisher is very busy herself with Canada Day and Independence Day and new releases and just one thing after another.  Patience is a virtue!  But it’s sure not fun!! 

Anyway, that’s my latest.  I’ll post my new cover.  But I wanted to keep everyone up to speed.  I’m back home now, finally, and through the craziness surrounding my dad, DH and I are in the middle of a remodel of our home theater, not to mention DH’s best friend and his son are coming to stay with us tomorrow to attend the wedding of another friend this Saturday.

GACK!  It’s batshit insane these days!  LOL

~~Becka

After a long and harrowing adventure a year in the making, THE FALL OF JERICHO has finally found a home.  I am delighted to announce this book has been bought by Cobblestone Press!

I wrote this story originally for the Harlequin Historicals Undone line, and after six LONG months, they R’d it.  Then, Carina and Samhain R’d it too.  :’(  Hmm.  It’s really not a horrible book, I promise you!  I was told a six month wait time is a long time for HQ Undone to get back to you so I was on pins and needles.  But with their rejection, they sent me a nice letter of plot points that didn’t work for them, another “rarity” supposedly with these short stories.

So close and yet so far!  **sobs into beer**

But being the intrepid eBook author I am, I spiced it up some and handed it to Cobblestone with shaking hands.  It had been R’d three times.  Gack, by the fourth time, you’re ready to throw it in the trash and start over, you know?  Thoughts of “Hmm… Maybe I should offer this as a free read since no one wants to publish this dreck?”

BUT, there wasn’t a fourth rejection.  Cobblestone really enjoyed the story, and I must say, I’m very happy/joyous/relieved they did.  Why?  Well, I finished JERICHO in June of ‘09.  Here it is, one year later, and the ink isn’t even dry on my contract.  I suppose I’m spoiled by the fast pace of ePublishing, as one year to get a contract is quite the long haul for us eAuthors.  But I’m also relieved because this story proves that A.) not every house will love every story  B.) Even if you’ve been around the block, you’re never guaranteed a sale and C.) THE FALL OF JERICHO isn’t dreck!  YAY!

So to that end, I will leave you all with my blurb.  I’m hoping to see this story published in the coming months.

Author hopefuls, may this be a lesson to you.  Never give up, never surrender!  Your Plan D might just be the ticket. 

~*~*~

The walls around his heart come crashing down…

Mercy Ainsworth never stopped loving Jericho James after he’d left town. She’d once pledged her virtue to him after a stolen kiss. Now that he’s returned, one look is all it takes to convince her he’s still the reason the sun rises and sets.

After the death of his sister, Jericho became a hardened bounty hunter. When he travels back home, danger follows him, and the girl he once loved is now a woman who desperately needs his help.

Sparks fly as old embers are fanned into roaring flames, but will love alone keep Jericho by Mercy’s side?

~*~*~

Yup, another Western.  Expect anything less??  \:D/

~~Becka

So, today was The Day.  I had my MRI Arthrogram to find out WTH is wrong with my left wrist.  I won’t have the official results until I talk to and/or see my doctor, but what I went through was very fascinating, so I thought I’d share.

First, I went into the x-ray room.  They needed to x-ray my wrist because a doctor needed to see exactly which joint he was going to inject the dye into (since the wrist has 8 little bones, every place the bones touch each other is called a joint.  He needed to know which space, or compartment to inject, and he needed to see the bones to do it.)  He did this with a cool machine that pulled out over my belly (I was lying on my back) and was a “real time” x-ray.  Meaning, hi, this gadget is taking a pic of your hand in real time, they don’t run to leave the room and push a button.  It was kind of like the x-ray machine at the airport, but you could see exactly what he was doing in there on the screen.  Very interesting.

The doc first injected me with a local anesthetic, so I didn’t feel the needle piercing into the soft tissues of the joint.  (Oh the drama).  Next, he watched the x-ray screen to make sure he was getting the right spot.  Once he was there, the fluid felt like it was inflating my hand like a balloon.  Very odd feeling.  Afterward, they took me to the actual MRI area where I was asked many times, “No earrings?  No keys in your pockets?  Did you take your bra off?  No barrettes?  No pacemakers?  No keys in your pockets?  No phones?  No jewelry?  No keys in your pockets?”  I understand, and I actually was relieved they asked me so many times, as forgetful as I am that this machine takes MAGNETIC images.

Anyway, so I’m in there, facing the torture tube.  I’m actually glad they let me go to the bathroom first, as I was doing the MRI for a good 45 minutes.  Ask to go potty before you do this!  Especially if you had a Coke not a 1/2 hour before.  So the radiologist has me lie on the bed/tray thingy on my belly, with my left arm out, like Superman.  They wrapped a splint-looking thing to my wrist, to keep it immobile, then placed it in this plastic cuff-looking thingy and in I went.

Oh, and they gave me earplugs.  Good thing, too, cause that machine is LOUD!

Anyway, I’m not a big claustrophobic, however, the moment they inserted me (snicker) I was instantly dizzy and nauseated.  I have no idea if that was due to the machine, the fact I was inside it, or the fact I was on my belly moving on a platform going into a small round space.  But vertigo overtook me for the first few minutes.  I soon got over it, as there’s some light air blowing on your face, and I had a fluffy pillow to “nap” on.

I managed to sit still for the entire procedure, and it helped that all the nurses, radiologists, and doctors were very nice and helpful with my questions.  At the end of it all, I asked if I could see the images.  The nurse gave me a hesitant, “Okay…but he won’t be able to tell you any results.”  That’s fine, I’m just fascinated by it all.  So I saw the images for about a minute, while the radiologist is explaining about my little bones, the tendons, everything in there (as they took top views, bottom views, cross section views, and side views).  As he’s rolling through the images (which I can’t make hide nor hair out of), I notice one in particular – of the dye all bright white against the stark shadows of my bones, seeming to be oozing out of one of the compartments on the far left of my ulna (the pinky side of my hand).  Now, we all know I’m not qualified to read MRI’s, but it would seem to me this would be an indication of a peripheral TFCC tear.  I just got a quick glimpse of it, and even staring at an MRI, I can’t see most things radiologists can see, so who knows, I might be totally blowing smoke.

Good news is, I should be hearing from my doctor within a day.  The radiologist told me if I don’t hear back from my doc within 24 hours, to call them.

Bad news?  Well, the doc who numbed my hand said it would last for about an hour.  Here it is, almost 7 hours later, and the back of my hand is still numb.  It seems to be getting better, though, little by little, so we’ll see how it goes.  The tip of my index finger was numb up until an hour ago, and is fine now so I’m thinking that doc’s math was a little off.

Anyway, I just wanted to give you a play-by-play of what happened at the hospital today, as I know some people who are getting an MRI have no idea what to expect.  Despite what your orthopedic surgeon might tell you, it’s not painful!  The most pain I felt was the “sting” of the dye, but that just felt like a slight burning, and then it was done.  Your wrist will feel uncomfortable with the pressure of the dye in there.  Also, if you go to the bathroom after you’ve been injected, it might hurt a bit, because now, you’ve got your ligament tears and the dye in there, so take care with that.

When I see the doctor for the follow-up, I’m going to ask to see the films, because what I saw today was just a short flash.  I want to be able to at least take a picture of the films to show you guys.  I’ll let you know what my hand surgeon says now that my MRI has been achieved. 

~~Becka

Over the past few days, I’ve noticed my cast was really loose.  It caused me a LOT of pain because I could move my hand in there.  My hubby told me to call the doc, because I might need a new cast and its better than going the four weeks and doing it wrong.

So I call and the receptionist tells me if the cast is loose, I need to come in.  So I go, and the nurse wants to ask the doc’s opinion.  She leaves me for a bit, then comes back to take the cast off, because I’m going to get a new one anyway.  She wanted to ask the doc about splinting instead, so I could have it be tighter.

I’m in the middle of washing my arm – feels so good! – when he comes in.  He seems annoyed my cast was off.  Then he goes into explaining how they don’t have a full arm splint and why I needed the cast with my arm bent, to prevent looking at my palm, and to prevent the side-to side motion of the wrist.  I told him I understood that, but that there was a lot of play in my cast, which hurt when unscrewing the lid to the milk jug, etc.

I was shocked at his look of shock.

Doc: “You’re not supposed to do that!”

Me: “Well, I didn’t pick up the jug, I was just taking off the lid.”

Doc: “Doesn’t matter, ANY action of the wrist, even small ones, won’t allow it to heal, and I can’t send you to the hand surgeon until we’ve proved this treatment didn’t work.”

(Basically, even if he thinks this won’t work, he’s gotta do it first.)

Me: “I have no problem wearing the cast, it’s just that it was so loose that it allowed for the side-to-side motion.”

Doc: (somewhat mollified) “Okay, then I’ll see you back in a few weeks.”

But now I’m kind of mad because no one told me I couldn’t do ANYTHING with this wrist.  The lady who put on my first cast even told me she’d give my fingers some room to grab things…  True, she’s not the doctor, but it would have been nice if someone (re: the doc) outlined what was expected in the first place.  All he told me was it would be hard, I’d need people to help out, and I’d have lots of physical therapy after.

SIGH

So, doc leaves, and the nurse puts on cast #2, and all the while I’m thinking the doc just chewed me out (dramatics added for effect) for doing the right thing by coming in and changing my cast.  Even the nurse said sometimes the arm shrinks in there, swelling goes down, etc., causing the cast to get loose.  I just feel like the doc thinks I’m whiny.  The splint wasn’t even my idea and he marches in there as if to tell me I will wear this cast, by gawd… (again, dramatics added).  And I was a little miffed that he couldn’t see the evidence of my loose cast for himself because the lady had already taken it off.  It was like he thought I was being whiny and there probably hadn’t been anything wrong with it.

I understand his decree of total rest, I do.  But if I’d been TOLD THAT in the first place, I might not have had so many issues.

Still would have needed a new cast, though.

I decided to go purple with the new one.  But I’ve still got glitter!  It’s much skinnier than my first one and it feels SO MUCH BETTER!  Oh my gosh, night and day difference.  Can’t move anything around in there.

Doc’s probably off some place shaking his head that his patients are dumbasses.  LOL  Or maybe he woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  He *was* wearing a full suit, whereas the other times I’ve seen him, he was business casual.  Maybe he was stressed about something.  Maybe I just blew it all out of proportion.  But I’ve got news for ya, doc.  NO ONE wants this wrist healed more than I do.

And that’s a fact.

I did notice that while my elbow was somewhat tender, I could bend it all right once I was out of the first cast.  But my wrist – forget about it.  It hurt to just hold it while the nurse prepared the new casting material.  My ulnar side was much more swollen that it had ever been.  This does NOT bode well for getting the cast off in 3 weeks…

My daughter said, “Wow, Mommy, your arm looks much skinnier in that cast!”  I said, “I wish the rest of me looked skinnier.”  One of the nurses going to lunch in the parking lot snickered as she overheard me.  LOL

Anyways, here’s to doing/holding/carrying/twisting/lifting absolutely nothing until February 9th.  For all intents and purposes, I’m one-handed.  And yes, I’m typing one-handed right now.  Yes, it IS a giant PITA.

Pic of purple cast:

~~Becka

After weeks of pain, my Doc is confident my pain is due to a tear in my TFCC, better known as the Triangular Fibrocartilage Complex.  It’s a collection of ligaments and cartilage on the outside of your wrist that allows for mobility of the joint and helps hold everything together.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tM_O2cnlgh8

I had a bit of swelling along with bouts of going numb in my pinkie and ring finger that would sometimes go up my arm like someone smacked my funny bone.  So just to be safe, the Doc sent my to a neurologist to see if I had Ulnar nerve entrapment.  But my test was normal.

So my ortho did one more test with me after I told him exactly where the pain was.  He grabbed my ulna and radius and moved them back and forth, opposite of each other.  OMG what a weird combination of strange, creepy and tickly.  I could feel the weakness in there.  He did it to my right wrist and everything felt fine.  That cinched the diagnosis for him.

He told me I had two options.  One is to get a full arm cast for four weeks followed by physical therapy afterward.  The other was to go to the hand surgeon, get a painful dye injected into my wrist to see where the tear was on an MRI–then get casted for four weeks followed by physical therapy.  LOL  Well, since I didn’t want to go any longer without what seemed to be the only form of treatment, I decided to get a cast.  Talk about a shock!  I totally wasn’t expecting that.

So as you can see, I decided to have fun with it.  I got the pink, and the lady was nice enough to give me spray-on glitter!  Figured the only way to stay positive with a full arm cast where my arm is bent for 4 weeks on top of a small baby, 4 other kids and a house to take care of (not to mention my writing) was to have a little levity with the situation.

Now we’ve got to get used to the adjustment.  When I broke my wrist as a kid, I had a full cast for 4 weeks then too.  I remember getting it off and not being able to fully extend my arm for maybe a week after that.  It was painful.  I also remember the pain of bending my wrist for the first time.  Doc said, “Yeah, you’re not 13 any more.”  Hence the PT I’ll need.  **shudder**  But it’s not just because of the cast, the PT is also to help the TFCC strengthen and regain mobility.  Not looking forward to that.

I’m hoping this mode of treatment works.  The only other treatment is surgery to suture the tear.  Now, it’s an out patient procedure, but it still hurts like hell and can take weeks/months to recover from.  DO NOT WANT!

So, that’s the news from this end.  No writing for me for awhile.

How did I injure myself, you ask?  Well, I don’t really know.  It’s been hurting since early December.  The only thing I can think of is when I pushed myself off my couch three or four different times and felt something in my wrist like someone plucking on a guitar string.  It didn’t hurt at the time, just felt odd.  Shortly thereafter my pain began.  That may or may not be how it happened, but it probably was.

However, good news!  Champagne Books just bought BLACK ANGEL!  That’s my fantasy novella about the hero with obsidian black skin and wings!  I love that story and will be proud to see it with Champagne!  Woohoo! 

~~Becka

When I was 13 years old, I was riding home from school on my bike.  I had a book in my right hand because I didn’t have a backpack.  Then I hit a patch of gravel.  Couldn’t stop the front wheel of the bike from jack-knifing and down I went, breaking my fall with my left hand.

Of course, that fall resulted in a multiple fracture.  I’d broken three bones in my wrist and hand.  The bone in your hand that goes to your thumb, one of the larger bones in your arm (not sure if it was the ulna or the radius) and one of the many little bones in the wrist itself.  Doc said I must have hyper-extended it.

All these years later, I’ve had problems with it.  My thumb especially.  I can’t straighten it fully like I can with my other thumb.  And it aches so much during cold weather.

Last month, my wrist really started hurting.  I thought huh, weird.  Maybe I’d strained it somehow, but it wouldn’t go away.  When I was wrapping Christmas gifts, it really started to hurt, and one day when I was mopping with my twist-head mop, I thought I was going to die.  That’s when I knew I should get a wrist brace.  So my hubby got me one and it felt wonderful, but the pain wasn’t going away.

To make a long story short (too late) I made an appt. with an orthopedic surgeon.  Saw him today and got some x-rays done.  Good news is, there is nothing wrong with my bones.  Bad news is, thus begins the hypothesizing on what it could be.

I’d done some research online and latched onto something called TFCC, where the “triangle” of ligaments in your wrist gets a tear, making for pain along the outside of your wrist, the ulnar side, the side with your little fingers.  It hurts when you rotate your wrist, even for mundane things like turning a doorknob or starting a car.  And forget about holding that gallon of milk.  Well, my pain wasn’t exactly like that.  The sharp pains came every now and then, but mostly, it just ached, up the ulnar side of my arm and along my little and ring finger of my left hand.

Doctor spent about 20 minutes with me doing different wrist tests, and he asked if it was tender to the touch.  I told him yeah, but deep down, like it was underneath something.  So he dug on down in there, and yup, he found it!  He asked if my hand/arm had ever gotten numb.  I told him not all the time, but it sometimes has that weird, dull sensation after you hit your funny bone when it aches.

Then, he bent my arm and did a few more tests, then informed me he thinks it might be my ulnar nerve.  You see, when he bent my wrist, he hit my ulnar nerve at my elbow (where you hit your funny bone) and I didn’t have a reaction.  No reflex.  Well, hardly one.  I barely felt pins and needles in my pinky.  So, he thinks I have a pinched or compressed nerve in there.  Which makes sense, since it’s not sharp pain, but more like a dull ache that buzzes.

So, next Monday, I’m going to a nerve specialist to see where the problem with this nerve is.  If it’s in the elbow itself, my ortho. surgeon can take care of it.  If it’s compressed in the wrist, I’ll have to see a hand surgeon.  Seems to me it would be weird to be in the elbow if my wrist is what’s hurting, but I’m not a doctor, and I have no idea how nerves work.

Anyway, they’re going to stick electrodes in me and send pulses into my nerves to see if the problem is elbow or wrist.  He said it’s not pleasant.  But I have every confidence I’ll live through it.  It cannot possibly be as bad as the time I had to rotate my broken wrist on the x-ray table to be perpendicular to the table.  Despite having 5 children and enduring labor pains and a broken ankle, tailbone, and big toe, I still believe that one wrist x-ray with that radiologist torturer was the most painful event in my life.  I was screaming in there, I remember that much.

However I do believe it’s in my wrist.  Things just don’t feel “right” in there to me, and even the doc was feeling my tendons and such for a few minutes with his furrowed brow.

So for now, I’ve got to wait another week and keep wearing my brace when it gets to be too much to bear.  Like right now, for instance, writing on my laptop with my arm resting on the table, further compressing that nerve.  UGH.

Well, that’s the saga.  No writing this week at all.  Might not be for a while to come.  We shall see…  I just hope it’s not really messed up in there.  Don’t want any surgery.  Especially with a nerve.  Scary stuff!  I’ll keep y’all updated.  In the meantime, I’ve got another week to get through.  Joy of joys.  :-/

~~Becka

So this past week, my hubby had a pot-luck at his work.  He had the awesome idea of bringing chicken enchiladas.  But he didn’t want to bring them cold and not warm, nor did he want to make them early in the morning and bring them to work hot as they would still be cold by lunch time.  So he needed a way to keep them warm and/or warm them up.

His brilliant idea was an electric skillet.

But the one we had was old and sad.  It was this little 12″x 12″ deal, that looks like it has seen it’s fair share of world wars.  Most of the “non-stick” coating is scratched off, not to mention it just wasn’t big enough for the shindig at DH’s office.  This thing is literally a dinosaur; a gift from DH’s grandparents on the occasion of our wedding nigh 15 years ago.  It was well used, but now, we needed an upgrade.

I got out of the habit of using an electric skillet because my family is so huge and I didn’t have a big one.  My pans were good enough, as I have a jumbo iron skillet I use all the time.  But, we needed the skillet to do the enchiladas, so off to Target I go.

I found a couple in their selection of bigger skillets, one a $30, the other $60.  Seems a no brainer, right?  Quick giant skillet for a one-time pot-luck, right?  Well, I stood there and weighed my options.  The $30 was indeed the size I needed, but there was some assembly required.  The $60 one was already ready already.  It had rubber feet so it wouldn’t slide on the counter.  And it had a lid that is held down with buckles.  AND a pour spout on one of the corners.

Okay, sold!  Here it was, already nearing 8pm, and we still needed to make the enchiladas!  I don’t want to put together the fricken’ skillet with a screwdriver while browning the chicken.  But it was indeed the pour spout that ultimately sold me.  Browning beef?  No prob, merely lock the lid down and drain.  Awesome Sauce.

So I brought it home, we made the enchiladas, put them in the fridge overnight, DH took the entire skillet to work the next day, plugged it in on 300 degrees an hour before the pot-luck and voila! Perfect hot, melty enchiladas.

That night, it was so easy to clean, just wipe out with a sponge, the non-stick coating is so super-sweet.

So last night, I decided to make frozen burgers for the family.  The thing held 6 big ol’ patties from Costco with no problem, enough to feed everyone without having to do a second batch!

I’m thinking I’m in love with this thing.  It’s definitely the best $60 I’ve spent recently, and I cannot stress how happy I am I didn’t get the less expensive skillet.  With the lovely coating, the lid, the spout and the sheer size of it, this bad boy is now going to be a staple of my kitchen for many years to come.

I love it when you buy something you thought you didn’t really need and it turns into something you can no longer live without. 

Five stars from Becka, for the $60 (Okay, $59.99) 16″ electric skillet by Hamilton Beach.  Well done, guys!

http://www.hamiltonbeach.com/skillets-premiere-cookware-electric-skillet.html

~~Becka

Didn’t take long for the agent to get back to me.  She wants me to send her my synopsis and the first 30 pages of RENEGADE!!!  Yay!  I was so nervous I didn’t want to open the email. LOL So I’ve printed everything out, now I need to send it on via snail mail, which I will be doing in the morning.  Woohoo!!  I don’t think she’ll get back to me as fast for the partial manuscript, but I’m hoping she’ll like it enough to request the full.

Now, she can still tell me to take a hike after she reads this partial.  Heck, even after she reads the full.  Nothing is set in stone until the “Hey, let’s talk about representation” talk.  And that hasn’t happened yet.

But it’s a step in the right direction and I’m pretty happy about it!  Woohoo!  I’m delerious!  Overusing my exclamation mark!  LOL

~~Becka!

(just to see if you were paying attention. Heh)

Just recently, I finished my historical western RENEGADE.  For those of you following me on this journey, you’ll know I’ve been working hard on this book for the past few weeks.  Personally, I believe it is THE. BEST. Western romance I’ve written.  Why?  Because it’s packed with more emotion and a deeper plot than the others.

That’s not to say I don’t LOVE my other Westerns.  But this one flowed out of me.  Despite the fast pace of the romance, the characters are thrown into a desperate situation and emotions and feelings are heightened because of it.  Both of them learn about each other and about themselves.  Both of them teach each other something, and both of them will fight tooth and nail for each other.

In fact, I love this book so dang much, I’m actually in a funk now that I’ve finished it.  My only hope is I’ll be asked to write a book about the sexy sheriff to revisit the characters.  (lol)

Okay, so here’s the thing.  I’ve been looking for an agent for awhile.  I’ve perused the ones my friends have contracted with and found one I liked at the Bradford Literary Agency.  My good friend Beth Williamson (who I’m buddies with in the Leather & Lace Anthology at Samhain) is with them, and she highly recommended them.  It was because of her glowing recommendation I decided to query them.  Now, it’s just an emailed query letter, I haven’t sent her anything other than the following blurb (see below), so she can still tell me to take a hike without reading a word of my manuscript.

Hopefully she won’t.

Because seriously, folks, I honestly feel if I can’t land an agent with THIS BOOK, then maybe I was never meant to write for New York.  It’s that good.  And I’m not just tooting my own horn.

Okay, so I am just a little bit.  But seriously.  Seriously.  I. LOVE. THIS. ONE.

While I have queried an agent, this book still has a long, harrowing road ahead of it.  If this agent decides to pass, I have a Plan B agent in the corner pocket.  If THAT agent passes, well, I’ll send it on to Samhain, as I do so LOVE that publishing house.  If THEY pass, I’ll probably question my prowess as an author (again lol) and try Champagne Books.  If THEY pass, then dammit I’ll offer it as a free read!  Somehow, in some way, shape, or form, you WILL read this book.  I don’t even care how much $$ I make off it…  It needs to be read.

I’ll keep y’all updated on what happens with the agent.  I’m hoping she’ll want to read at least the synopsis and the first three chapters.  Keep your fingers crossed for me!  I need some good juju after my Samhain rejection of BLACK ANGEL!!

Without further adieu, here is RENEGADE’s blurb:

For the love of an outlaw, she’d risk her life to prove his innocence…

Coyote Bluff, Arizona Territory, 1874

Olivia Hughes is alone.  Ever since her husband demanded a divorce, her father, the honorable Judge Hardison Black, has disowned her for it.  Due to the hospitality of a friendly old widow, she now lives above the laundry shop and manages to support herself, despite the looks she gets from the townsfolk.  A new start is what she needs, but she won’t find one in Coyote Bluff.

Thomas Langston is an outlaw, wanted for a murder he didn’t commit.  He’s convinced Judge Black took a bribe to send him to the gallows, and he won’t rest until he learns the truth.  He kidnaps Livie to force the judge’s hand, unaware her father wants nothing more to do with her.  Now, he’s on the run with a woman in tow, and he still has no idea how to clear his name.

Livie is Thomas’s one hope of redemption, but her offer to help only has him dreaming of other things.  It doesn’t take long before their mutual attraction turns into an all-consuming passion.  But when Thomas gets caught, the situation turns desperate, and he finds himself at the end of his rope.  Can Livie succeed in clearing his name before he’s found guilty and hanged?

The query letter I wrote to Laura Bradford was probably THE  most important query letter I’ve ever written.  If she decides to take a gander and then represent me, it would change the face of my writing career forever.  I’m seriously nervous here, folks.  But I’m so ready.  Chomping at the bit.  Wild horses couldn’t tear me away!  And I can’t think of a better genre to bust into New York with than a historical Western.  Bringing the Western romance back, one cowboy at a time.

YEEEHAAAWW!!!

~~Becka

Five years ago, I wasn’t published, but I’d submitted a novel for publication at a small, online Inspirational publisher, By Grace Publishing (who is now defunct).  In October of 2004, I signed my very first contract, and by January of 2005, I was a published author.

Why am I telling you this?

Because I’d just had a distressing thought.  Five years ago, I had a goal, and that goal was to be with New York by now.  Everyone has those “in five years” hopes, and mine was to be with a New York publisher.  Well, here I am, still rockin’ the small publishers, not that there’s anything wrong with that.  I’ve made a name for myself, that much is true.  I’ve confused people by writing both mainstream and Inspies (back in the day).  I’ve since stopped writing those tender romances, and focused more on fantasy, westerns, and paranormals.

I have a fairly good reader base, at least, a few people beyond my immediate family.  I think most of my friends know I write books, but only a handful of my friends have read any of my books, and even then, none of them are avid fans.  Would I like them to be?  Well, sure, I suppose.  Perhaps that’s why I never talk about my writing much, because everyone I know in real life doesn’t have any more than a passing interest in what I do.

But I’m not here to cry you a river.  I’m reflecting on my five year goal, the one that hasn’t come to fruition.  So, I find myself taking stock, and asking myself what I really want with regards to writing.  I WANT to be with New York.  I WANT to KNOW my books are in stores without “hoping” I’ll randomly run into them if I’m lucky.  I want to get paid an equal compensation for the work I fricken’ put into this process.

However, does being a successful New York author jive with being a full-time mom and homeschooler of five children?  Can one woman “do it all?”

I have no idea.  But I have made a decision.  In TWENTY years from now, much less five, I don’t want to look back on my life and think, woulda, shoulda, coulda.  I don’t ever want to pass on a dream I’ve had for most of my life simply because it’s hard work, time consuming, or a little scary.  If I try and I fail, well, at least I gave it a go and I can give this small press thing all the attention I can throw at it.

Therefore, I’ve decided my next full length novel will be going to New York.  I’ll probably be sending it to an agent, as I want to write the way *I* write and see if they can fit it somewhere, rather than trying to adhere to a specific publishing house’s rules.  This process is going to take awhile, as it takes a few weeks for an agent to respond to a query, then it takes a few more weeks after they request a partial, then a few MORE weeks IF they request the full manuscript.  From there, they shop it around, which takes more weeks, and once it’s sold, it can take months before it’s actually published.  This is going to be a long process.

I’m going to give it a good two years.  I can write a book, submit it, and find out about publication within that time frame.  In FIVE years, I want to have more than one book in New York.

And in that TWENTY year scenario I mentioned above, I want to be able to look back and be thankful I decided to finally kick my ass in gear and get the lead out.  No  more excuses.  I’m ready for the big leagues.  Bring it on.

~~Becka